As I travel along my path like many others, there are times when we must step out of our comfort zones. Doesn’t matter how confident we are, empowered, knowing we are worthy, or good enough. There are times we are faced with stepping out of our comfort zones. By doing this we can trigger old fears, doubts, and some deep beliefs, even if we think we have dealt with them.
This happened to me, I had a situation where I had to step out of my comfort zone, and it created feelings, of doubt, fear, not good enough. I knew I had dealt with all these things; however, another layer was surfacing. Through , I remembered an experience that I had in the past, where I had stepped out of my comfort zone and was learning something new.
It was a time when I decided to do bar work. The person teaching me was nice, however she proceeded to tell me everything about the job at once. All about the till, the buttons, and what each one meant, and how to use them. Then the drinks, beer on tap, wines, which was the house wines. Then onto about stocking the fridge, then how to pack the fridge, and where to go to do this. Plus, so much more, everything about this job in 3 hours. I asked a question or how to do something because I was unsure, it felt like you should know.
Then to top it all off being told tomorrow is our busy night as its draw night and it’s a big draw. We will have a lot of people here. One-night training and being expected to handle a big draw night with lots of people. Which normally you would be taught over a couple of days when it was quieter, to learn and be confident. I was totally swamped, felt overwhelmed and thinking can’t do this, I am not good enough.
How many of you experienced the same feelings of inadequacy, which then created many different emotions surfacing?
- How did you deal with it?
- Did you bury it?
- Or did you journal it out of your system?
- Did you talk to someone?
- Was that person helpful and uplifted you? Or did they make those feelings even worse?
Once I released the feeling of not good enough and where it came from, I started experiencing further emotions surfacing, as we release one layer the next layer presents itself.
What I noticed was the fear I was feeling, and talking to a friend this helped me get clarity. She was able share a couple of different perspectives with me. It helped me see that it was the fear of stepping out of my comfort zone, combined with the past experienced I had.
These feelings were being triggered regarding doing a job I hadn’t done for a very long time. I felt insecure and out my depth as I didn’t know what to expect or what they expected of me. I was experiencing the fear of stepping out of my comfort zone, and the realization I was facing the Fear Barrier often referred to the Terror Barrier.
- This is when we a faced with fear of moving forward. Often, we feel paralyzed or we sabotage ourselves, by stopping and turning away and going back to what we know. Then we have proof of why we feel like we do, and the reason, stories, etc.
- We have two decisions at this stage one is move forward, face the Fear/Terror Barrier and go through it. Or the second option, is turn around and go back to what we know.
- When you make the decision to face the fear / terror barrier and keep moving forward, what happens we pop out the other side. We are a different person, we feel confident, empowered, stronger, everything feels easier, lighter, happy and that we have achieved whatever was stopping us and we got through the barrier.
- It does take courage to go through the Fear / Terror Barrier, and some people don’t make it. They turn around and go back the way they have come, to what they know, even if it makes them unhappy and miserable.
- Once I realized what was surfacing through an old belief and facing the Fear / Terror Barrier, which was caused by stepping out of my comfort zone. I had clarity, I felt a sense of peace, and how to move forward.
- Even us coaches require support, from our coaches, and mentors, to help us work through what’s happening in our lives, and business. I have a coach who coaches me to move forward and into being a better version of myself, which helps me in my business and career. My friend she came from a different perspective, she was in an observation mentoring role and was looking in from the outside. She saw what was happening through my feelings and my experience.
- This experience helped me grow and gave me the opportunity to let go and release old beliefs, move through the Fear / Terror Barrier and popping out the other side. It was not scary like I thought, and it was very empowering experience.
- It gave me a sense of peace, I felt happier, stronger, and enable me look at the future with a different perspective and make decisions with a lot more knowledge and clarity.
- Does my story resonate with you?
- How have you coped stepping out of your comfort zone or facing the Fear / Terror Barrier?
- Or who do you know that is experiencing a similar story, or having to step out of their comfort zone, or facing the fear /terror barrier?
We all come up against both as we journey through life and it is how we cope with the situations. They are all there for us to grow into being better versions of ourselves.
If you stopped and looked back to 10 years ago, as you reflect you may see the changes you have experienced and how those experiences have defined who you are today. Some of those experiences would have taken courage.