Setting Boundaries

As we travel through life, we have many relationships with different people,


relationships are good, fun, satisfying, and you love being in these people’s company., like family, friends, work colleagues, partners, children. Some of these


In my own life I found myself having to have a look at some of my relationships. Majority were healthy and good.



However, by stepping back, I discovered there were some relationships that were draining me. I realized I hadn’t set my boundaries, and I was allowing myself to be drained and be taken for granted.

This was a huge wake up call for me. As I looked back over my life regarding past relationships the same thing had been happening.


Another thing I hadn’t realized was the subtle and sublimely comments being made that were also creating beliefs within in me that I was believing.


What really made me sit up and take notice, I was reading something I had written a few years back. I thought, “it’s like nothing has changed only different actors on the stage.

I knew this was not true because I had seen the changes within me, and what my loving friends were saying.



However, because I had some obstacles stopping me moving forward. I was being forced to reassess the route I wanted to take around these obstacles.








  • To start with, I felt a ray of negative emotions, upset, angry, tears,
  • despondent, vulnerable and many other negative emotions. I allowed all these emotions to flow through me, and let them have their say, and then released them. Even though it was painful, and I was feeling vulnerable, I knew that it was something I had to go through, to be able to know how to set up my boundaries and stopped being drained.
  •  Next, I gave myself forgiveness, I placed my hand over my heart and told my inner child I was sorry, please forgive, I loved her. thank you. I did the forgiveness and self-love every day.
  • Thirdly, I gave gratitude for being shown these life lessons. I felt gratitude for the lessons, and to everyone in my life, even to the people I realized were draining me. They had given me a precious gift, by showing me to set up boundaries, and allow myself to heal


  • As I reflected over my journey, I realized we think our road is straight. However Earth is round and so in affect


    we are going in a circle or circles. As we let go one or more lessons we move to the next level like a spiral. However, it can feel like we are negotiating the same lessons repeatedly, with different players, and circumstances.


  • Over our lifetime we have had many things happen to us, and they all get buried deep inside. You may be thinking I have dealt with these lessons. However, what has happened we are releasing the layers, and we release the easy ones first, the harder ones taken longer to  pop up to be released.


  • Many  still live in the past, not prepared to forgive, and harbor the resentment and hurt. However, what is happening we are only hurting ourselves,. The person or people who hurt us have got on with their lives, without realizing how much they hurt  us.  By harboring negative thoughts and resentment we are creating more negative circumstance into our future.
  • Have you noticed when you get up in the morning, and you stub your toe on the bed leg, you curse that. Then you trip over the cat or dog, or briefcase, you say something negative? Then something else happens, and then you rush out the door, end up in a traffic jam. Now you are running late for work,  and have you noticed that your day seems to go from bad to worse?
  • Then those mornings you get up and you feeling good, happy, things flow, and your day seems to flow with good things happening. You have dream run to work. You meet lovely people, your colleagues are happy you enjoy your day, and you arrive home feeling contented.
  • Our thoughts create things, and our thoughts are very powerful. Our monkey mind is continual chattering in our heads, and half the time we are unaware what we are telling ourselves. All our thoughts, our mindless chatter which is normally negative, is all going into our subconscious and  out into the Universe and it is being returned to us.
    The Universe has no reference of yes or no. It takes things literally. If you are sending negative thoughts out, you will experience negative things being returned. If you send positive things out, you will receive positive things back in your life.
  • Like the saying Yesterday is HISTORY, tomorrow is a MYSTERY, but today is a GIFT.” “–that is why it is called the present.” If we created wonderful gifts today the present, our future will be a mystery of wonderful surprises.


I realized that this was happening to me, and through talking to a friend she described something she had seen, it made perfect sense and resonated with me.


Once I saw a pattern then, I was able to shift and clear it. It was like I was being held back, having my wings clipped and being stopped from moving forward and succeeding.


Once I had this realization. I gave myself permission to heal, let go, step forward, and if necessary I was prepared to let go of whatever drained my energy.  I set up boundaries of what I would accept and wouldn’t accept.

What this did it –


  • Empowered me,
  • I was more confident,
  • I discovered my passion and mission in life,
  • I had greater sense of peace, understanding, acceptance, and gratitude
  • I was happier.







“Did this story resonate with you?”   “What would it take for you to change your life?”

Photos used in appreciation from unsplash
1st photo -rawpixel-323210-unsplash
2nd photo – julian-santa-ana-111265-unsplash
3rd photo- tom-pumford-254867-unsplash
4thphoto- banter-snaps-70553-unsplash
5thphoto- guilherme-stecanella-587579-unsplash


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